10 times “When life gives you lemons” for drunkards

When life gives you lemons there are so many better things to do than make lemonade.

When life gives you lemons there are so many better things to do than make lemonade.

Internet is booming with all kinds of advice. Who doesn’t know the phrase “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade”? Well, we have no doubt that the people who share this cliché have the best intentions, but the advice itself of course sucks. If life would actually give you a shitload of lemons, would the fabrication of lemonade really be the best thing that came to your mind? Well if you’re five years old maybe, but as an adult that’s just retarded. Not to worry though, we made up 10 great scenario’s you can try when your life path is in fact swamped with sour citrus. When life gives you lemons…

– It’s just God’s way to let you know it’s time to order a lot of tequila’s.

– Slap that smart ass barkeeper who pulled this prank on you while screaming “I said BACARDI lemon, fuckface!”

– Congrats, you found a new hobby. Pick up a masterclass on how to make limoncello.

– Wait for the first happy dillhole to suggest you should make lemonade an punch him. Real men drink beer or stronger stuff.

– Wait for the first happy fucker to suggest radler beer and do exactly the same as the previous point. Radler beer is lemonade!

– Make lemonade, find someone who’s life gave him hard liquor and have a kick ass party.

– (Women) Stuff them in your bra and enjoy the free drinks the boys will buy you.

– (Men) Fill up that spido and have your way with the free drinks and the cute waitress at the Mojito Bar.

– It’s time to admit your life sucks cause it’s incomplete. Try to trade the wife and kids for gin and tonic.

– Hit them with a baseball bat and see who’s more smashed by the end of the night, you or the lemons.

Micky Bumbar


Other posts on Lords of the Drinks you might like:

Troubleshooting chart for drunks

The best 25 alcohol related pick up lines

25 reasons why alcohol should be served at work

Top 11 sports to play when you’re drunk

The costs for a swimming pool full of liquor


3 thoughts on “10 times “When life gives you lemons” for drunkards

  1. Pingback: 11 Tricks to get drunk while low on cash | Lords of the Drinks

Leave a Reply