International Izbuhvam Day, the day we punish our livers

International Izbuhvam Day is the ultimate day for exploding.

International Izbuhvam Day is the ultimate day for exploding.

It’s no secret that the Lords of the Drinks love to drink and don’t mind to get drunk either. But there’s drunk and absolutely smashed, hammered, mortal, shitfaced or whatever you want to call it. One day in the year we know for a fact that we will not get fashionably tipsy. If our livers could speak, they would scream in fear. This day is the International Izbuhvam Day (IID), which is always held on the first Saturday of July. For the ‘infidels’ that have never heard of the IID before, pay attention and join us this Saturday.

First of all let us explain the word Izbuhvam to you. You might have seen this phrase before as the subheader on our website. Izbuhvam is Bulgarian for “I explode”. It’s a popular thing to say when you want to describe your state of mind when you are partying hard. All year long people inflame and erupt by this motto, as described in our article on Izbuhvamism. Anyway, IID has a somewhat different character because it’s an international holiday. Of course we would never discourage anyone from listening to chalga; it’s fantastic to see people everywhere around the world explode in their own traditional way. Even though this day is not just about drinking, this is the thing everyone who celebrates this holiday should have in common. Staying sober is not an option.

To help you celebrate International Izbuhvam Day in the best way possible, we wrote down 13 key points you should observe. Follow these advices and we have no doubt you will have an awesome time.

1. Do not overplan your International Izbuhvam Day. Pick a place to start the party and some friends. Like a club with cheap alcohol and music you can explode to, but you can celebrate IID anywhere. Party spirit is within right?! So just pick a spot and from there on just go where the alcohol takes you.

2. Planning is one thing, but a back-up plan for more booze is something totally different. You got to have one (or more) of those: a bar, a 24 hour store, an emergency bottle at home.

3. Make sure you got your favorite hangover cure (check our international hangover cures section for inspiration) ready for Sunday. You’re gonna need it and cooking is out of the question. Hell, a walk to the microwave may seem like a mission impossible.

4. Hide an extra key somewhere in the garden of your house. Chances are high you might lose your original key on the path of drunkenness. There’s also a fair chance that you’ll forget you have hidden this key or that you can’t find it when you return. At least you’ll have a nice surprise when you wake up in your garden in an actual bed of roses – which by the way isn’t as great as Bon Jovi claimed in his song.

5. Tell your friends and family not to worry when they can’t reach you. No matter if you end up in a ditch, the hospital or jail, there is a good chance your phone will be switched off.

6. Given the previous scenarios, it’s probably better to just leave your phone at home. At a certain point every conversation will be pointless anyway and you’d be shocked once the phone bill comes in.

7. On the same level: it’s good to look nice, but probably better to not wear your best clothes. You’ll understand why if you check the mirror on Sunday morning.

8. Now for the day itself: Start early! Anyone saying “It’s too early for drinking” clearly doesn’t understand the true meaning of this day. Educate the ignorant.

9. If anybody asks why you are so wasted in the middle of the day, you have to set them (let’s use plural, cause at this time you’re probably seeing double anyway) straight. Such ignorance. Look at them and say: “Are you kidding? Why aren’t you? It’s International Izbuhvam Day!”

10. Make sure you take care of the early victims. It could be you next time and you don’t want to be on karma’s bad side.

11. Spread the the good word wherever you go. Izbuhvamism should be widely spread. Use tools if you have to, but be loud. Don’t be afraid to be the centre of attention, more people will follow the right example.

12. If you are still able to talk, walk or other things like that, it’s too early to go home. Bouncers, taxi-drivers and the medical staff of an ambulance are here for a reason. They probably like their jobs, so don’t feel bad for them when they play their part in getting you home.

13. If things get so scandalous that you get court ordered for your activities during IID, always claim guilty as charged and ask the Judge to set you free given the under special circumstances. International law is superior to the national ones. Claim your right to explode, ask for support by Amnesty International if you must, but never deny your actions. Stick with ‘I’m sorry, your honor, it was an accident. I was having too much fun.’

Micky Bumbar

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5 thoughts on “International Izbuhvam Day, the day we punish our livers

  1. 5. Or the MORGUE. Put a NOT a DONOR document, also. Nobody wants your sour liver anyway.

    9. Never did understand why folks have to wait til five oclock to start the buzz but yet mimosas are perfectly acceptable.

    14. take a puking bag in your pocket.

    Like

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