In court for a drunken rampage

court

 

And now it’s time for another joke. Has alcohol ever got you in trouble with the law? Ever got a fine or better yet, have you been to court because of alcohol related incidents? Well if you ever are, you now know what to say to the judge. Enjoy!

A man goes out on a Friday night to celebrate his paycheck just came in with a huge bonus. He goes to a bar and starts off with some beers. Gets to know some nice girls and of course they start taking tequila shots. They go to the next bar and have some jager bombs. Before he knows it they take him clubbing. Some cocktails later he finds himself in a strip club knocking back scotch and vodka on the rocks.

Than things get blurry. He wakes up in prison and has no clue how he got there. His cellmate explains to him that they met last night in the strip club. “First you jumped on stage, yelled that you could do better than the girls there and started taking your clothes off. You got into a fight with the bouncers and that’s where you got the black eye and the broken nose. After that you wanted to cool off in a bar. When the barkeeper refused to serve you, you smashed half the bar. Outside you started jumping on cars till you felt and broke your shoulder. When the cops arrived, you tried to run away and a police dog bit you in the nuts, while you were taking a beating. Now we are waiting till they take us to court.”

Half an hour later the man is brought in front of the judge, bruised and broken. “Do you know why you are here?” The man looks rather shy and mumbles that he is not sure. “You are here for drinking”, adds the judge. The man now looks up with a look of relief and says: “great! when do we start?”

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