Joke: the drunkard and the bum

Opnamedatum: 2010-09-29

‘The Mayor of Delft and his Daughter’ by Jan Steen from 1655.

 

After a bunch of deeper stories it’s time for some simple entertainment. In other words: time for a joke. Have you ever had some homeless bum ruining your buzz by asking for money? Well,  as you will see, you can spin this situation into your advantage. Enjoy this joke and if you want more, you can always visit our collection of drinking jokes.

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The oldest Arab cookbook has a recipe for wine and ‘the ultimate hangover cure’

The oldest Arab cookbook  dates back from 10th century Baghdad.

The oldest Arab cookbook dates back from 10th century Baghdad.

The oldest cookbook from the Arab world dates back from 10th century Baghdad. Nice, you may think, but what does that have to do with drinking? Well, in Kitab al-Tabikh (Book of Cookery) the writer Ibn Sayyar al-Warraq didn’t just collect recipes for culinary dishes but also a lot for all kinds of health problems, including a hangover cure. Al-Warraq also gives a recipe for a strong kind of wine. Not bad for a time when alcohol was more or less forbidden in the Abbasid Caliphate.

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Bond movie crew goes on a drunken rampage in private airplane

The private plane that took the Bond crew from Essex to Mexico City.

The private plane that took the Bond crew from Essex to Mexico City.

There is always enough drunken action going on in Bond movies. An English study concluded that Agent 007 must be a ‘functioning alcoholic’. But apparently there is plenty of action going on behind the scenes too. The 18th of March all hell broke loose when members of the film crew for the new Bond movie got smashed in a private jet from England to Mexico. They vomited and urinated on the floor, ignored the non-smoking policy, verbally abused the cabin crew and even removed a safety pin from one of the aircraft’s doors. With that the Bond boys and girls triggered an international  air safety alert.

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Mark Twain, the drunken father of American literature

Mark Twain was quite the busy bee, although he usually drank from the  morning till the night.

Mark Twain was quite the busy bee, although he usually drank from the morning till the night.

If there was ever a functioning drunkard it must have been Mark Twain (1835-1910). In our list of historical drunks there are some  examples of troubled minds, but that was absolutely not the case for this American author. Fellow writer and heavy drinker William Faulkner would describe Twain as ‘The Father of American Literature’. His novels The Adventures of Tom Sawyer and Adventures of Huckleberry Finn in time became absolute classics. Yet the man was known to drink all through the day.

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Drunk guy tries to rob a bank in Tallahassee to pay for his cab

Stanley Geddie, the drunk bankrobber.

Stanley Geddie, the drunk bankrobber.

A drunken man tried to rob a bank in Tallahassee (USA) last Wednesday. The 46-year old Stanley Geddie stumbled out of a taxi and told the driver to wait for him outside the Capital City Bank, as he was going to get the 25.50 dollar he owed him for the ride. Once inside Geddie told the bank manager he was carrying a .357 handgun, as well as C4 plastic explosives. The drunken robber demanded 100.000 dollar or he would ‘blow the place up’. He also claimed he had the place surrounded.

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Kokoreç, the forbidden hangover food from Turkey

A kokoreç sandwich, the typical hangover cure from Turkey.

A kokoreç sandwich, the typical hangover cure from Turkey.

We already gave you some tips and tricks to get rid of your hangover. But every country has its own traditional dishes to make the process go faster. We like to give you a taste of the international anti-hangover cuisine. In this episode we try out some typical street food from Turkey named kokoreç. It’s made with several kinds of lamb or goat organs, wrapped in the intestines. This may sound gross to  some  people and kokoreç is even forbidden to sell in the European Union, but it’s actually quite delicious. Not to mention effective on rough mornings.

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Beer stealing pig gets cut off at own bar after head-butting customers

Micro-pig Frances Bacon with her owners Vicky and Ian Taylor.

Micro-pig Frances Bacon with her owners Vicky and Ian Taylor.

It seems pretty clear that pigs don’t handle their alcohol too well. After an intoxicated wild hog in Australia attacked a cow, we now found an example from England. In a pub in South London a micro-pig was given a lifelong alcohol ban after it started head-butting customers in an attempt to get their drinks. Just before that Frances Bacon, as the Vietnamese pot-bellied pig is called, had already ‘mine swept’ the bar, as it downed all abandoned glasses.

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